The French culture is very contradictory. On one hand one is very proud of being a republic born through a revolution. A revolution where they did not only chop the head off every person with a name older than two hundred years, but also off everyone that they happened to dislike. That could be the guy next door who was cheating with your wife, your boss at work and really anyone you felt like getting rid off.

Still, compared to Sweden, French people are so impressed by titles, by family and by all kinds of “important” people. So much for equality! This show by all the decoration people carry as soon as they can, but also by the flare they have for being President of this or that. You are a very important person if you are President of the local pétanque club or of the local stamp collectors club.

This became quite obvious when we played the Carcassonne Golf Club. I will tell you the story:

The first hole is spectacular. The hole starts with a very steep uphill that almost kills you. I am sure it is like 40-50 meters elevation and the ball have to carry 175 meters to be on the fairway. We had our tee-time at 2.10 PM and the party before us started a bit early so we had quite a distance to them, which is good because we did not want to push them. We started almost 15 minutes after them. When we were struggling up the hill on the first hole we heard the next party hitting their balls that landed in the slope just behind us. Luckily enough none of them could drive more than 120 meters so we were just about safe. They had a tee-time at 2.20 but started just 3 minutes after us. Off course we got a bit frustrated and said to each other that we should not be stressed because they did not know how to behave on a golf course. I must admit that I immediately labelled the four gentlemen as Germans as that is my experience from German golfers. I hereby apologise to all German golfers for my mistake!

Even the next stoke was landing just behind us and on the second hole, where it was a sign that it was absolutely forbidden to hit before the party ahead had left the hidden part of the fairway, they just hit the ball so it landed ten meters behind us. We were quite angry now which affected our game quite seriously. To make a long story shorter we managed to keep our temper two more holes but after again being chased by their tee-shots we stopped and asked them what starting time they have had. They told us that they had 2.20 and they demanded to pass us because we had an empty hole ahead and they, as a four ball, was entitled to pass a two ball!!!! First we tried to speak with them in English but as they were French they did not understand a word. We changed over to French and made them aware of the fact that the reason why we had an empty hole before us was that we had started on the right time, which also was the reason why they played too close behind us as they started too early. In any normal situation this would be quite a simple matter for people who know the most basic rules of golf, but not in this situation. One of the players whispered to my wife that she should be careful because we were talking to the president of Golf Club de Carcassonne. We almost burst out laughing when we heard this. Why on earth should anyone be impressed - and maybe even afraid – of a President in a little golf club in south of France. In our Swedish twisted minds we thought that a president of a golf club should be extra careful about his behaviour on the course, which we said to them. But, this is France – and if you are President you are above all rules of golf and arrogance is obviously a virtue. Anyhow the president made the worst insulting comments he could think of by calling us •~ Englismen, and we answered that we were not English at all, but Swedish, which seemed to be the same shit to this group of gentlemen if you judge by their faces.

It is quite amazing that a civilized country like France can allow attitudes like that from those who are selected of trust to govern our common recourses. I thought that was something you only find in banana republics in South America.

I am sure some of you think I am one of those duffers that are beginners in golf and do not know what I am talking about. It is not so. I have been playing this noble game for 40 years, have a decents handicap of 11 and used to be a certified refree in golf competitions in Sweden when I was younger.

So, to all golfing tourists in Languedoc I can recommend Golf Club de Carcassone as being a beautiful and demanding golf course with very polite and helpful people in the reception and also a very good restaurant, but be careful and make sure that the President and his party is not around; especially if you are English – and maybe from now on, Swedish. And, put on a helmet just in case he sneaks up on you. On the other hand, if you are further away than 130 meters you do not have to worry.

And remember; if you are pressed in time, just start three minutes after the party ahead and demand to pass them on the first hole. Also, mark the local rule that parties with fewer balls have to give way to larger parties. If you are President of the local Bakery Club, The Garden Club or The Chess Club at home; make sure you can prove it so you can give yourself any rights on the course.

To talk about something more pleasant. In the little just fantastic links club DOOKS on the Ring of Kerry in west of Ireland they used to have a big poster in the clubhouse saying: REMEMBER! A GREEN-FEE PLAYER IS A MEMBER FOR A DAY.